Top 5 Most Bangable Fire Cards

One thing most NFT games don't have is pure, raw, sex appeal. Well, Splinterlands is popping off with some incredibly hot fire cards. Pun definitely intended. Let me preface this by saying these are only of the cards I own and have access to right now, so there may be some hotties I don't know about yet.

Number 5

Goblin Shaman always comes in clutch during matches and he's got some mad squatting game but what puts him at a solid 5 on the list is the hands. Look at them green gangly hands. Gross. No nail care whatsoever. Also, his face looks like he's taking a mad poop and I'm not into that.

Number 4

Serpentine Spy takes number 4 on this list cuz he's got those piercing green eyes that would make anyone blush. With his low health, even a stiff wind could knock him over but ill be the wind blowing him tonight, if you catch my blatant sexual reference.

Number 3

Malric takes the number 3 spot because he's an undeniable hottie among hotties. Not only will banging him most likely give you a permanent +1 to melee damage, look at the hair and the building biceps that just scream with lust and masculinity. The nose does kind of detract from it a bit, but can't win em all...just look at my ranked history and you'll see that's true. All in all, he's a chad and Id let him be my summoner.

Number 2

Serpentine Soldier goes without saying a number 2, his abs and the fact he takes 1/2 damage from melee means I can pound him for twice as long. He's got some daddy issues for sure with those green eyes and that angry-looking face. He's got a total bad boy haircut going and he rocks it. A solid second place.

Number 1

I don't have a thing for older guys. But gad dahm when you look at this card don't you get a little nervous. Efreet is rocking the beard and the DILF look at 200% power. He's got magic damage and I hope that's not the only thing magical about him. He's also rocking mad fuck me eyes and you know it. All in all the hottest manz of my current fire cards.

Feel free to drop your manz in the chat so we can continue this discussion.